Today during Sunday School I started having thoughts about how the priesthood has personally blessed my life and as a result I came up with the following:
Throughout my life I have had many blessing from and because of the power of the Priesthood. When I was younger my father was a marvelous example on what a true worthy Priesthood holder both acted like and how he held himself. I was often able to ask my father for a blessing of comfort or healing, but his shining example always has and still means more than all those blessings. Now, as I am older and spend much of my time away from family I have noticed that I tend to spend my time with more men than women. Someone once tried to analyze me and tell me the reason I did this is because I didn't trust women, bust as I have reflected on this more and more I realize that I surround myself with men I see as worthy Priesthood holders.
Through most of my adult life I have usually had 2 really good guy friends or people I can turn to. Having gone to school at BYU-Idaho finding these important and influential men was easy. This was all due to the fact that in order to go to that school they, for the most part, must be worthy.
Now, I know of several men besides my brothers and Father that I go to for that wonderful and meaningful feeling, but the two I spend much of my time with right now have taught me the greatest lessons. These two worthy priesthood holders have huge redeeming qualities. They would never admit to it, but I know and quite often see their humility. They consistently boost confidence and discuss the importance of the gospel in their lives. This is usually not done with many words. However, it is done by and through their actions.
As I continue to better myself each day, and eventually find my eternal companion I know he will be all of these wonderful men combined in one.
The Power of the Priesthood is a huge part of my every day life. I love the men I surround myself with and especially those two that diligently honor their priesthood. I also really love my brothers and father for showing me throughout my life the importance of the priesthood.
So, before I begin my long rant on words I first want to direct you to read my friend's rant on relationships. It's so powerful and just makes me smile that I just know he may have written it for himself, but definitely something I needed to read Kevin Goldberg's advice with relationships!
I know it's cliche' to start off with a dictionary definition of "words", but I feel it is needed for my long rant of the month. Dictionary.com defines word as:
So, words have great meaning. We often don't think before we speak, but the written and spoken languages are very powerful. I have been thinking tons lately about what words mean to me. And how often as humans we aren't thinking before we speak, or in modern world we don't think before we send out a text that could possibly offend our friend, and then wonder why they don't respond to us. This leads me also to talk about unspoken or unwritten words. Our actions are words as well.
First let's talk about Spoken words. How do we talk to people on a daily basis? Do we use our LARGE vocabulary and think through our words carefully, and use synonyms to guide us to sound more intelligent? Or do we decide to get upset and just say the most demeaning and condescending words we can think of. Being LDS and also from Louisiana I find joy in learning other languages. My passion language to learn outside of English is French, and I am amazed over and over again that the words are special! They each have a meaning that is just beyond divine. Spoken words in any language can be used to hurt or heal. And more often than we should we use them to hurt rather than to heal.
Now, let's talk about written words. These words I speak now are all written, but I hear them in my head so to me they are also spoken. I think we often forget that about people. Working at Sylvan Learning Center has taught me the power of all different types of people. Some people can imagine pictures as they see words, or some have to do what the words say and live by them. Or others (like myself) hear the words as they type or read them, and can hear the person saying them in a certain tone. Many times it's again either a hurt or healing tone. Also, written words these days are in technology everywhere. Text messages, emails, blogs, facebook, twitter, and any where you have a "virtual" reaction with another human being. In some ways (my opinion) written words can be more powerful than those spoken because we often don't sensor ourselves when writing as we would if we were to vocally say something. If there are some like me our mind can go faster and faster and as our fingers may be able to keep up with it at times our mouths cannot. When we read books it's the written words that are speaking to us. Even if we are more auditory we may think of the words speaking in a spoken manner.
Now, our actions. From personal experience I think our ACTIONS are the LOUDEST of WORDS. Think about how often we give someone the "shaft" without even realizing what we are doing, or say we notice a guy or a girl who we like and we show them through our actions. Or even better we haven't fully picked up on hints that someone else has been dropping for months and all of a sudden that person who is to be a wonderful friend automatically doesn't want to speak to us. We often as humans don't realize how we act around others can often hurt or heal. A friend challenged me to notice my actions in a way. To learn to sit extremely open. He taught me about chakras and how each chakra is important. He taught me how to speak with my body, and not offend others by closing off around them. This has taught me why Actions truly are words.
All this makes me think about a famous saying that I have always heard, but in my opinion is wrong. "Sticks and Stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me." The truth is words can hurt more than sticks and stones. Broken bones can heal, but what hurtful words can do to harm the soul is ten times worse. It can take a person days, weeks, months, years, or even a lifetime to overcome the hurtful words that were once said to them.
All of this brings me down to my desperate story that is driving me lately. Especially after this last week and the realizations I had. Do we truly mean what we say all the time? I have always been afraid to put what has happened to me out there for all the public to read because then it is real. However, now that I understand it all so much more I am realizing that it all comes down to words, and it's the unspoken words that were never said that should have been. The words were "I love you." I have been letting people know that I did not lose my best friend to death, but instead to life. I had my greatest fear come true and I locked myself up afterward. I began to not care about any words except the words I constantly said to myself about how I wasn't worth it, or there was nothing I could do. However, now I know that even if I never get the chance to speak those words to the people that need to hear them. I know how I feel, and it's not hate or anger, but LOVE!
Love is the greatest of all words, and the most powerful. The Savior loved us enough to die for each of us. We know this thanks to the scriptures... we read and hear spoken words for the action and feel the unspoken word.
I know all this may be hard to comprehend cause it is a tad rambled of my tired mind, but I love words and the meanings they have.
Now, please before you DO or SAY anything think about the words you put out there. And think if I say this will I hurt or heal. Please say you will heal. This is what I try for daily, and I know that in due time I will be able to tell the people I want to that my words were never truly said.
When people ask me about my favorite holiday, and I give the answer EASTER I am often given strange looks. I get remarks about how I love it because of all the candy (jelly beans or chocolate rabbits), or even that I have to be so wonderful for the Easter bunny. However, even though all of these reasons are wonderful it is not why I love Easter so much.
Easter is special to me because for me it has always been a time to reflect upon the life I live. Growing up in a home where my mother had been raised Catholic and then converted to Mormonism helped me even more to have that love for The Gospel and The life Christ lived. For me, if it weren't for Christ's atoning sacrifice and Him rising on the third day there would be absolutely nothin else. I love Easter in all because it shows with a sign of rebirth (being in the spring) that The Father truly cares about each of us. He allows us to attend church, and remember Him in all that we do.
In Louisiana I often remember how the time leading up to Easter is most precious to other churches. There are altars and masses given that allow the people of other faiths to reflect on the fact that He is there for each of us, and has a great devotion to care for us. He allows on this day to have a full reflection of who He is and in turn figure out who we are. The Lord has a desire to help each of us, and through this desire He has shown me personally that I am His daughter and I am He knows me by name. He has made me not only His hand maiden, but His elect daughter to serve Him in every possible way. He has given me much to be grateful for, and love and Honor Him in all that I do and say.
At times I often think back to my youth when I first got my patriarchal blessing and how I felt when I was told that the Atonement would become a meaningful part of my life. When this occured I did not fully understand what was meant by this. I thought that I would have some HUGE TRIAL that would nearly shorten my life, or I'd have some BIG DISEASE where I would have to struggle to stay strong with my health. However, NONE of this has happened to me. I went to college at Brigham Young Universtity-Idaho, and it was there I began to understand the truth behind all of it. It was hard being far away from family, and the place I had long called home, but I came to understand that I could have my family close no matter where I was. I learned that through the Atonement of Jesus Christ we never need to feel alone or as though no one is out there rooting for us as we play the great game of life.
As I left college I learned that the Lord truly works in mysterious ways. My parents had moved from Louisiana to Utah thus making it possible for me to come and live with them. As I moved to Utah I realized I was leaving behind all that I knew thus far in my life. I was now to live somwhere that I knew absolutely no one, and be a child in my parent's home. In college I did have family close by (a grandmother in Idaho Falls) so it wasn't as foreign. Moving to Utah I began to search of what my point in life was. All of my friends from college were moving on in life and I felt like I was thrust into the world without a purpose. I began reading the Pearl of Great Price and the first part of the Old Testament so that I might more fully understand what the Lord asked of me. Soon, I decided I should talk to my Bishop where for the first time I really told someone outside my family (as far as the gospel goes) what my thoughts were. It was there I first began to realize my purpose. As I told Bishop about all the times I prayed about going on a mission and receiving the answer of no, and then I discussed that I knew I was almost done with school and I earnestly did not know my next journey to take. I told him of how when I prayed about going through the temple I didn't really receive an answer one way or another which really bothered me. Then, my Bishop looked me straight in the eyes and said, "Frances, you are ready to enter the temple. I want you to begin attending Temple Prep. Today." Temple Prep started that day and I went. I felt at peace and at home with my place in that class. I knew that the Answer received through my Bishop that day came straight from my Father in Heaven. for the next 2 months as I went to temple prep I earnestly prayed to know of the truth of what I was being taught.
I received my endowment on June 19, 2010 and it was on that day that I began to realize the sacrifice HE made for me. As the next few months and couple of years unfolded and friends were lost, and new journey's presented to me I have been able to see that even though parts of us die (or so we believe) He has given us a wonderful blessing. His atonement and resurrection has given me the strength to wake up in the morning and keep going. I know some of the greatest people now. I am so glad I have been blessed to have certain friends especially right now. Some of these friends I got to know in the most awkward of circumstances. Others, I have been intrigued with since the first day I saw them. But no matter the circumstance I am eternally grateful that I have them in my life!
As I end this ramble of Why I love Easter and why it is all so special to me I am reminded that it is okay to sometimes just not want to do anything at all. I am grateful to those people in my life (family and friends) who have taught me how to live righteously throughout my life. ESPECIALLY, my Savior, elder brother, and redeemer! HE has given me the greatest example of all. May GOD BLESS each and every one of you on this EASTER SABBATH and throughout the year as you reflect on your happiness! :)
So, as normal on my Saturday mornings I woke up EARLY and went to the temple. I went to the 6:30 session and then had breakfast. As usual the Lord has a way for me to stay longer than originally intended in the temple and then still be able to do all that I am needed to do. Before me in the breakfast line was a huge line of youth. And they ran out of French Toast so I had to wait on mine. I thought to myself of how amazing it was that I could stay in the temple just a little longer just nourish my body after nourishing my Spirit and mind! Well, after the temple I went home to get ready to go and send out fliers for work. Well, again the Lord has different plans, and so does work. This is where I'm eternally grateful to my sister! I had to go help get things organized just to make sure all would run smooth, and she went and did the fliers. I was only at work for a few minutes, but at the time I thought of it as a huge pain. However, I have learned that despite what I may think at the time all works out for the better. Let's go back a little bit... I have learned that without sleep I am not a happy camper, but this also means that I need time to myself to learn and grow even if that is just relaxing my mind in some sort, but rest still helps me. So, Friday to Saturday I got a total of 3 hours of sleep. Therefore, when I got called to go to work I realized I wouldn't be able to rest before going to a baby shower that I at first thought was at 11:30 only to look at the invite and see it started at 11. Yeah! CRAZY! So, I went from the temple to home to Layton to home to Roy! I am very grateful I went to that baby shower cause I got to see a friend from college and yeah, all part of the healing process that I've loved! Well, then I came home and got invited to watch the REAL game at my friend's cousin's house and they would have bbq chicken and peach cobbler all made in a dutch oven! The game started at 6:30 and we'd all go over around 6:00. This gave me some time to take a well needed nap and I was smiling when I awoke from it! I like smiling when I wake up! So, on my way to watch the REAL game I stopped to get oreos for that night. See, last night around 10pm we would be at improv in Clearfield to see another friend perform. :) Brewskies (ibc cream soda) and oreos. Let's just say everything went as planned.
Now today being Palm Sunday I reflect and realize that the Lord has truly blessed me in life. First in college he gave me some pretty awesome friends and now I have new pretty awesome friends. I spend much of my fun time with these two guys who have been simply rock stars. Yes, they are way flawed and are imperfect, but they still rock! I am grateful to have met them both and the friendship I have with both of them.
As the week comes along and even though it will be absolute craziness due to how much I'm working I am still VERY grateful to the Lord! I'm excited for Easter because even though it's coming fast this year I am so happy about it! I love my Savior! He is remarkable! :D
Today during Sunday School I started having thoughts about how the priesthood has personally blessed my life and as a result I came up with the following:
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Through most of my adult life I have usually had 2 really good guy friends or people I can turn to. Having gone to school at BYU-Idaho finding these important and influential men was easy. This was all due to the fact that in order to go to that school they, for the most part, must be worthy.
Now, I know of several men besides my brothers and Father that I go to for that wonderful and meaningful feeling, but the two I spend much of my time with right now have taught me the greatest lessons. These two worthy priesthood holders have huge redeeming qualities. They would never admit to it, but I know and quite often see their humility. They consistently boost confidence and discuss the importance of the gospel in their lives. This is usually not done with many words. However, it is done by and through their actions.
